What happened?
Aug 14, 2007 12:32 AM
That was strange...my blog posted before I even wrote anything but the title. I will write my blog now. Weird! I am up and not having to lay down all day...I am so excited! Maybe if I get to it I will work on Jacob's scrapbook some more..I am nearly done after six long years.
Anyway, to Elizabeth who asked how we are potty training our two year old son, I first have to say every child is different. Our first son wasn't potty trained until he was four because he was a 25 week preemie with a shunt and mild cerebral palsy. We weren't sure if he was capable or not. He didn't seem to be until he was about four. I noticed when he started gaining control and pooping his pants on purpose. I told him not to, he did it anyway and so I put in in the "naughty chair" in his poopy pants. He cried and cried. He hated the "yucky" feeling. I felt really guilty, but he knew better....he never messed his pants on purpose again!!
My daughter Hannah potty trained herself when she was two years and about two months old, the week Nathan was born. Very funny! She gave us no trouble at all and about a month later was hospitalized for two weeks for a staff infection. She had to have three surgeries and though it all she only had two potty accidents that happened when the anesthesia was wearing off from two of the surgeries. The medical staff were amazed by her. They didn't weigh diapers for her, she had to potty in a hat...everyone thought she was at least four years old. My husband and I thought....oh, she is good at this because she is a girl. She was potty trained before Joshua was.
With Nathan my two year old it has been a totally different experience. He was capable, physically ready(this kid can run sideways just as fast as forward) and had been practicing since he was 17 months old. He is extremely stubborn and likes to be in charge. My husband and I were frustrated because we both knew he was purposely messing his diapers. We had tried a few times before and Nate would stay dry and clean for two days, get tired of it and purposely potty and poop in his pants. The books always say don't punish a kid when you are potty training, but this was a control issue for Nate. It is sick to change diapers if you know your kid is capable. With Josh he just wasn't capable at two.
So I was talking to my mom for advice. I was trying to come up with a natural consequence for purposely going potty and poop in the diaper or underpants. It just didn't make since to take away toys or t.v. Those things had nothing to do with potty training. My mom had a spark of inspiration. She suggested spraying his bum with cold water if he did it again. It sounds so mean, but I tried it.
Before I tried it I talked with Nate(he also understands better than most two year old boys his age). I told him what would happen and why it would happen. I told him that when he did a poop in his underpants it made his bottom smell bad so we would have to wash it off with cold water to get him clean. I also used a ton of positive reinforcement. We talked a lot about how old he was now and about his birthday that he had in June. We talked about the presents, cake and balloons he had. We also talked about how he was too big for diapers because he was two now; and diapers were for Hannah's baby dolls. It sounds like a lot, but whenever he would give me trouble about sitting on the toilet to go I would remind him of all these things, and it worked. I only had to wash him off with cold water three times. Once for poop and twice for potty(all were done on purpose). He learned fast who was in charge....me the Mama!!!
He is now telling us whenever he needs to go and has stayed dry now on most nights. He loves his cool underpants and I think he feels good about himself. He runs around the house and shows each family member his underpants for the day. Yesterday my parents were over and he ran up to my mom who was laying down and stuck his bum right in her face and said, "Grama look...my turtle underpants!" He asks to look in the mirror at himself and his great underpants.
Again, I want to point out that this probably won't work for any child with developmental delays(especially preemies). I could have never sprayed Joshua's bottom with cold water in the bath tub. He would have been so confused and physically incapable at two years old. Nathan is not a little skinny kid with tons of medical problems like Josh was. Emotionally, I could have never done that to my preemie(sometimes I still get images of Josh hooked to wires and breathing tubes). But I didn't feel bad doing it to Nate, a full term capable ornery two year old who was trying to control everything. You know what? After this experience he is even going to bed better...no more screaming in his crib...he just goes to sleep!
Oh the joys of parenthood...potty training. You know what? Eventually, most of us learn how to use the toilet. In twenty years will it matter if you were potty trained at four or two? Probably not!
What a silly blog! I hope you all have a nice day!
Tiffany
Anyway, to Elizabeth who asked how we are potty training our two year old son, I first have to say every child is different. Our first son wasn't potty trained until he was four because he was a 25 week preemie with a shunt and mild cerebral palsy. We weren't sure if he was capable or not. He didn't seem to be until he was about four. I noticed when he started gaining control and pooping his pants on purpose. I told him not to, he did it anyway and so I put in in the "naughty chair" in his poopy pants. He cried and cried. He hated the "yucky" feeling. I felt really guilty, but he knew better....he never messed his pants on purpose again!!
My daughter Hannah potty trained herself when she was two years and about two months old, the week Nathan was born. Very funny! She gave us no trouble at all and about a month later was hospitalized for two weeks for a staff infection. She had to have three surgeries and though it all she only had two potty accidents that happened when the anesthesia was wearing off from two of the surgeries. The medical staff were amazed by her. They didn't weigh diapers for her, she had to potty in a hat...everyone thought she was at least four years old. My husband and I thought....oh, she is good at this because she is a girl. She was potty trained before Joshua was.
With Nathan my two year old it has been a totally different experience. He was capable, physically ready(this kid can run sideways just as fast as forward) and had been practicing since he was 17 months old. He is extremely stubborn and likes to be in charge. My husband and I were frustrated because we both knew he was purposely messing his diapers. We had tried a few times before and Nate would stay dry and clean for two days, get tired of it and purposely potty and poop in his pants. The books always say don't punish a kid when you are potty training, but this was a control issue for Nate. It is sick to change diapers if you know your kid is capable. With Josh he just wasn't capable at two.
So I was talking to my mom for advice. I was trying to come up with a natural consequence for purposely going potty and poop in the diaper or underpants. It just didn't make since to take away toys or t.v. Those things had nothing to do with potty training. My mom had a spark of inspiration. She suggested spraying his bum with cold water if he did it again. It sounds so mean, but I tried it.
Before I tried it I talked with Nate(he also understands better than most two year old boys his age). I told him what would happen and why it would happen. I told him that when he did a poop in his underpants it made his bottom smell bad so we would have to wash it off with cold water to get him clean. I also used a ton of positive reinforcement. We talked a lot about how old he was now and about his birthday that he had in June. We talked about the presents, cake and balloons he had. We also talked about how he was too big for diapers because he was two now; and diapers were for Hannah's baby dolls. It sounds like a lot, but whenever he would give me trouble about sitting on the toilet to go I would remind him of all these things, and it worked. I only had to wash him off with cold water three times. Once for poop and twice for potty(all were done on purpose). He learned fast who was in charge....me the Mama!!!
He is now telling us whenever he needs to go and has stayed dry now on most nights. He loves his cool underpants and I think he feels good about himself. He runs around the house and shows each family member his underpants for the day. Yesterday my parents were over and he ran up to my mom who was laying down and stuck his bum right in her face and said, "Grama look...my turtle underpants!" He asks to look in the mirror at himself and his great underpants.
Again, I want to point out that this probably won't work for any child with developmental delays(especially preemies). I could have never sprayed Joshua's bottom with cold water in the bath tub. He would have been so confused and physically incapable at two years old. Nathan is not a little skinny kid with tons of medical problems like Josh was. Emotionally, I could have never done that to my preemie(sometimes I still get images of Josh hooked to wires and breathing tubes). But I didn't feel bad doing it to Nate, a full term capable ornery two year old who was trying to control everything. You know what? After this experience he is even going to bed better...no more screaming in his crib...he just goes to sleep!
Oh the joys of parenthood...potty training. You know what? Eventually, most of us learn how to use the toilet. In twenty years will it matter if you were potty trained at four or two? Probably not!
What a silly blog! I hope you all have a nice day!
Tiffany
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